Tufts Blogs

Coming to a school like Tufts means surrounding yourself with people who care strongly about the things that they do. I’ve written about imposter syndrome at Tufts before, but I continue to be extremely aware of all the amazing accomplishments my friends are making. Most recently, many of my CS peers are accepting job offers. That’s right--a significant portion of my group of friends knows

(a) where they will be living

(b) what product they will be working on

(c) how much income they will be making

(d) what their life will look like in a year from now.

They’ve got it figured out. They’re taking time to plan their post-grad Euro trips. And as I apply for graduate school, I’m extremely aware of the fact that I won’t even know what my options are until March, when acceptances come in. I like plans, but I’m part of a shrinking group of people who don’t have one yet, and that’s hard.

On the other hand, being surrounded by people who are this excited about their futures is a constant reminder that there is life after applications. It keeps me conscious of the huge variety of options available, and to the reality that choosing one now doesn’t mean sticking to that choice for the rest of my life. There are a lot of motivations that lead people to decide on a future, and by having very real, honest conversations with my peers, I’m learning more about what they value, and am able to form a more educated view about what’s important to me, which is ultimately going to shape the decisions that I make in the next year.

It’s been difficult to be constantly comparing myself to the people around me. Even though nobody is trying to show me up, I still find that my natural tendancy to be silently competitive with my peers has caused significantly more stress than usual this year. That being said, making these decisions alone would lead to me making them with a significantly narrower worldview, and having that awareness is more valuable to me than my personal pride.