To all the college hopefuls that have been deferred:
The other day a Facebook message from my good friend back home popped up on my phone. For the sake of this post and anonymity let’s call him Craig. He is a successful senior in high school, president of the student council, and probably as mature as an 18 year-old can get. Craig has had a dream of going to an elite university since the beginning of high school. He spent an accumulated amount of what seems like hundreds of hours into making his application as perfect as possible. Everything was set to be the road to glory. He was going to get in to the school Early Action, and then there would only be second semester and summer break separating him from a new beginning in college.
But there’s only one problem. He hears back from the school and it’s not the answer he was hoping for. On Facebook this feeling was voiced to me only using one word: “Deferred.” It was accompanied with an embarrassed emoji face.
I offered him this advice:
I know that right now this is THE school you want and that, in your mind, there aren’t any other options. Before you think it’s the end of the world and that you’ve “failed at life”, look at everything you’ve done so far this year. You wrote an average of three essays per college plus the general essay. You dealt with the changes in the Common Application. You took THE SAT and the SAT IIs (multiple times). All of that came with the hardships of keeping your grades up and balancing all the awesome things you do outside of school with preparation for your future. Be proud of yourself!
This semester was hard work. Everyone wants to get his or her first choice. I get it. I know how hard you worked for it. Remember that deferred does not mean denied. You are competing against thousands of other high school students in the U.S. and around the globe. And now you’ve just got to wait and see what happens. April isn’t that far away! For now, take a deep breath and take advantage of the holiday season.
And besides, wherever you end up, you’ll be brilliant I promise you that.