The wait is almost over--those early decisions will be arriving in the next few weeks (we will release decisions by December 18th) and I offer some parental guidelines:
Take a deep breath. Please remember that each University makes deliberate decisions based on the applicant pool, institutional priorities and space. In the land of selective college admissions we are unable to admit every qualified applicant and have to make very tough admission decisions.
- Tell your daughter now that you are proud of all of her accomplishments regardless of the admission decision.
- Remind yourself that your son’s admission decision is not a reflection on you as a parent; how you react to the decision is.
- Have a conversation now before the decision arrives about a back-up plan – what if the decision isn’t the one your son is hoping for? Make sure he has a list of colleges he will apply to and can get excited about. Does he know the deadlines for each of the schools on that list?
- Encourage your son or daughter to open the early decision privately, away from the noise & angst at school. That private moment with a special friend or loved one will be on her or his own terms. A celebration hoot or consoling hug nearby makes it manageable.
- If your daughter is deferred or denied let her be disappointed, sad, angry and/or frustrated. All of those emotions are valid. Give her time to absorb the decision for a few days, take another deep breath and then go to the back-up plan (#3).
- If your son is admitted, celebrate his wonderful accomplishment! Remind him that some of his peers will not have the same outcome so he (and you!) should be sensitive to others who also applied Early Decision.